Currently, I am trying to teach myself to always remember saying Alhamdulillah in whatever situations I am involve in.
La haw la wala quwwata illa billah~
I am trying to strengthen my heart by saying this kalimah whenever I heard or see the things that I don't like and I need to force myself dealing with it.
Astaghfirullah hal a'zim~
I try to melt my heart by remember Allah through this kalimah so I won't stray too far from the right path.
Firstly, this entry might makes some people feel kind of offended or uneasy. In lieu to this, it is highly advisable to those who are very sensitive, or maybe very judgmental, or love to make assumptions to discontinue reading this entry. This entry basically all about my feelings, regardless I know or do not know what actually had happened. Any feelings after continue reading this entry are basically at your own risks.
1) A secret makes a woman, woman.
In life, there are the things that we only feel safe to share it with few numbers of people that we actually trust a lot. How do you feel when things that quite personal to you been revealed by the person that you trust a lot? Plus, it's not been revealed to a person, but to too many persons. Can you build the trust back once you encounter with this type of problem? Remember, trust takes year to establish and moment to destroy. Think, think and think!
I was once been trapped in this type of problem when I did kind of curhat with a person that I trust a lot. Surprisingly, something related with my curhat have been mailed to everyone and after that, the situation that I described in my curhat have becomes a very popular and famous example in any meeting or any situation that you may called it as meeting or things-that-similar-to-meeting for almost the whole of this semester. Please, try to put yourself in my shoes and think, think and think!
2) Halo error.
Do you know what halo error really means? OK, let me tell you. In Human Resource Management terms, halo error basically referring to one of the most common errors in evaluating a person's performance appraisal. This error is happen when you mark a person as totally good or maybe totally bad just because of one factor.
For me, a person that always do this kind of error is basically a judgmental person, and errr.. those judgmental people, please discontinue reading this entry. This is the second time I do this reminder and please, never blame me for this entry since I have remind you.OK?
What is the significance of this halo error to my life through out this semester? Ahaaa, lets me keep it as my life secret. Just want to tell you that, a judgmental person shall not regret if people around him or her will also react the same towards them. Hello my dear, what you give, you get back! (One of my dearest have remind me about this meaningful quote.) Thank you dear :)
Another point is, shall we just trust a people at one side and never takes into account how the other side actually feel, think or have gone through? Think, think and think!
3. Interfering ones personal life.
This is basically thing I hate the most. Mind you, it's kind of "pantang-nenek-moyang" for me if there is anybody outside try to interrupt into my personal life. I believe, everybody knows how open I am and I will tell you the real things happened when I am ready to get any feedback regardless how good or bad it will be. Asking a person or trying to get to know things from people that only knows about something related to me from his or her own observation might be a wrong step. How to say ya?
OK, I don't mind if you still want to believe 100% story from one side. But, why don't you try to ask me first on what did I actually have done rather than you also comes with so many "unnecessary" status or maybe entry or maybe anything in non verbal way which I know you are trying soooo hard to tell anybody around you that I am bad and you are pretty good? Please, think, think and think! Remember, I always say this sentence to anybody around me, "Aku paling tak boleh if ada orang try to advice me about this and that but sooner, he or she will do the same thing. If later sikit, boleh la nak terima...Kannnnnnnnnnn"
The phone call, stalker and sudden gtalk. Haha~ Always be remember till the end of time. Good try anyway. Keeps it up, dude!
4) Unnecessary stress.
Hahaha. This phenomenon makes me always feel kind of doubt about what relationship really means. Let me put a very high emphasization on this point. You will never feel stress about others if you do not have any bad perception towards that person. Remember this. Keep it at the best pisition in your mind so you can remember this point forever. Put this inside your heart as well. Please!
Erm, shall I elaborate more about this? Erm.. I think it's better not. But please, put this in our mind and heart ya~
5) Unnecessary thoughts.
Thoughts. We can express our thoughts in many way. Isn't it? Anybody disagree? Ahaaaaaaaa.. Sometimes, we can express our thoughts through verbal word, or maybe through non-verbal way. But why I wanna say about this point? Hurm...
Sometimes, I do believe that my own status might makes everyone feel stress (can we say this as unnecessary stress or not?). But, there are many times that we shall keep our inner feeling for our own. I won't elaborate more on this point, but, please, think, think and think!
One thing that I always put in my mind and heart, if you want to tell or confess something to a person, please, do it by verbal way. Non-verbal way may leads to misperception. Misperception may leads to misunderstanding. Misunderstanding may leads to negative feeling. Negative feeling may leads to bad relationship. Can you see this?
Maybe this time I also have done the same thing since I did this entry which basically kind of confession by non verbal way, so, can you tell me what do you feel now? Is it good? Or, you might love it very very much? Or, you feel kinda @#$@^$*&$?
This is basically a general entry but I am currently writing it with a bit of my emotional interference. As I have mentioned above, reading this entry is basically at your own risks since this is about "Yang Tersimpan". Shall there any regret or uneasy feeling arise, please forgive me but as I keep on mentioning for many times, continue reading this entry is basically at your own risks.
Good bye 4th year 1st semester. Thanks for all the memories.
~berdoa dan terus mengharapkan redha Illahi...~